Texas couples going through a divorce might find themselves wondering what changed. Even the most loving and happy marriages can fall apart, seemingly without reason.
Sometimes the cause of even the best marriages falling apart is depression. This common mental illness can seep into your life quietly, making it hard to manage many parts of your life – including your relationship.
How depression manifests in relationships
When visualizing depression, many people picture a person who doesn’t have the energy to get out of bed or do anything but cry. This isn’t what depression looks like in today’s society. Instead, depression can have symptoms such as:
- Sleeping problems (sleeping too much or too little)
- Loss of appetite
- Increased irritability
- Passiveness
- Reckless decision making
Depression makes us feel disconnected from things that once brought us joy. The biggest symptom of depression for anyone is a loss of interest – you might disengage from hobbies and people you love.
Why depression ruins relationships
No one really wants to be around someone who’s constantly snapping or doesn’t engage with them. It can leave partners feeling ignored or unwanted.
This can cause fights between couples and lead to resentment. The undepressed spouse is mad that their partner isn’t engaging with them anymore, and the depressed spouse resents their partner for asking so much of them.
At its worse, depression can lead to reckless behavior or bad decision-making. Depressed spouses might start drinking more or turn to infidelity as a result of their depression.
How to recognize the signs
If your spouse has suddenly pulled away from friends or family members, seems disinterested in everyday things and doesn’t seem to be happy doing things they’ve traditionally found fun – these are all telltale signs of depression. Looking back, it might be easy to see the pattern, but it’s much harder to spot when you’re in the moment.
Talking to your spouse, offering support, and helping them seek treatment can be a lifesaver for many marriages. Oftentimes, your marriage might come out stronger than before.
With that being said, if you’re trying to offer this support and you’re getting stonewalled or your spouse seems unwilling to seek help, there’s not much you can do. If your spouse isn’t seeking help for their depression, it might actually be time for a divorce.